Haji
by Solibat
Summary: [AU ONE-SHOT] She will have to take her own life even it's against her own will.


The inspiration for this fic is a visualization I had once. I imagined Major Sakamoto commiting ritual suicide. I am a sucker for things related to Samurais like Bushido, Honor & dignity. Ritual suicides. Since Major Sakamoto is based on the Sky Samurai Saburo Sakai, I view her as samurai.

This fic has no specific plot. It's simply a "what-if?" fic hence making it AU.

This will be my last fic for the meantime. I won't be making any fics for a while because I want to focus on studying and improving my art. I'll be back soon.

恥 - Shame _(haji)_

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_Duchy of Romagna. August 5, 1945, 11:45 AM Daylight savings time_

The sun was at the peak of its brightness and the summer breeze can already be felt on the Romagnan shores. The weather was nice. No one would ever think that something bad would happen on a bright summer day or rather, no one would ever think of ending one's life on this highly favorable weather.

But someone chose the wrong day to die.

It never dawned to this person how beautiful the day was. Perhaps she overlooked it or she didn't care at all. That day was the day she took her own life by her own hands, as dictated by her nation's customs when dealing with dishonour and shame. Her superiors had sentenced her death by firing squad, but by some amazing stroke of luck or otherwise, she was allowed to choose how she would die.

A week prior, she was summoned by her superiors and a select few individuals. When news of her execution was announced to everyone in the base, a dead silence had befallen them. Some were horrified, some quietly wept, one had no idea what was happening since this certain subordinate was still an innocent child and one broke down in tears the moment the announcement was made. Nobody dared question how or what happened for they knew that it was a highly classified incident and their questioning will fall on deaf ears. Well, no one except two people. The child subordinate who insistently kept on asking what _seppuku_ was and a certain sergeant who had no idea about affairs concerning the military. The child subordinate was hushed by her older friend from who also looked downcast after hearing the news. Being the innocent young ward she was, this certain sergeant frantically asked her mentor and superior why they would impose a death sentence on her. She only asked the young sergeant to keep quiet and to listen to the details of her execution. The young sergeant was speechless as tears started to well form her eyes. The Sergeant just sat down and placed both her arms together on the top of the table then she placed her head on top of her arms and started crying. She felt sorry her young subordinate but she had to maintain a façade of toughness. She had act strong in front of her comrades for that is something a true warrior of Fuso will do in tough times like these.

In the days that followed, she stayed in her room, reflecting about anything and everything in her life. From enlisting in the Navy, making friends, rivals and enemies as well, facing changes that came along, climbing her way up to promotion, and meeting people who greatly affected her life. A tear or two were shed on reflecting upon these.

She was not a great believer of self-inflicted death as atonement for tarnished honor but culture and heritage dictated her to do so. It was part of the package of belonging to a dignified clan of warriors that if she will do something that would ruin the reputation that was made by her ancestors for many centuries. She will have to take her own life even it's against her own will. She could have ran away or escape the fate of dying with her own hands but she didn't want to blemish her honor further. A friend and close confidante, having heard if her predicament, had suggested running away in a distant country with her but she refused the offer. She was also worried about the subordinate who broke down after hearing the news of her impending death. That subordinate who used to follow her around and admire her. She has grown fond of this subordinate and she found it regretful that she won't be there to guide this subordinate anymore.

Just in case disemboweling won't finish her off, she asked one of her subordinates to her finish off but that subordinate was still in the state of shock upon hearing the news and she couldn't decapitate a superior who taught her a lot of things. It was the young sergeant who asked her during the meeting why she was to be executed. She saw a lot of potential in this young sergeant and she hoped that someday she will grow up as a fine soldier. She decided to do things on her own for no one was willing to help her or see her die.

Clad in her ceremonial white robe, she kneeled in front of the small round table. On the table was a piece of clean white cloth with a sheathed dagger above it. Beside the cloth was a note she had written. Part of it was written in her native language, part of it was written in the language she shared with the rest of her foreign subordinates. The note would serve as her farewell to her comrades.

She slowly unsheathed the dagger and held it with her two hands. Holding its handle firmly with a tight grip, tears began to flow from her eyes. She was obviously doing things haphazardly but she had to continue. There was no point in running away because she knew that she would die anyway. She had to do it on that day. She stared at the sharp object which she gripped in an upright position. She lost her resolve for a bit and she began sheathe the dagger back to its scabbbard. She began reciting an unsaid prayer, not sure where it was addressed to. She began cursing her superiors who have slyly outwitted her advances leading her to taking her own life. She knew that her frank manner of speaking would actually gain her enemies in the military but she took it to little regard. It took her about thirty minutes to get her resolve back.

She was ready.

She unsheathed the dagger again and wiped its sharp edge with the white cloth. She held the handle again with her hands, this time the tip was pointed towards her stomach. Bushido dictated her to do this so she must follow.

_I have no regrets!_

She thrust the pointed object to her stomach and her mouth let out a forceful moan of anguish which echoed through the halls of the base. Crimson liquid began oozing out from her belly. She also tasted something metallic in her mouth. The crimson liquid began gushing out from her lips as well. She thrust the dagger deeper and moved it horizontally across her belly. The crimson liquid had stained her white ceremonial robe. To end her suffering, she moved the dagger from her stomach and pointed it to her neck. She let out another cry of anguish as she stabbed her own neck with the blood-stained dagger. She collapsed on the _tatami_ mat of her room. She was now bathing in her own blood but she had not lost her consciousness immediately. Before darkness engulfed her, she heard a gunshot which came from the outside of her room.

_The following day_

News broke out of a certain squadron of the Allied Forces that had lost two of its commanding officers. Maj. Mio Sakamoto's body was found lying on the floor of her room, bathed in her own blood. The cause of death was massive blood loss due to wounds in the belly and neck area. The weapon used, a Japanese dagger or a _tanto_ was found beside the body. The other one, Lt. Col. Minna Dietlinde-Wilcke, was found sprawled on her desk inside her office. Also on her desk was a Walther PPK pistol. The cause of death was a gun to the head. Both deaths were considered as a double suicide. Both women were allegedly involved in a forbidden relationship. Sakamoto also went under court martial for assaulting a superior and slandering of Her Imperial Majesty's naval force.

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Aand it's done-

Thank you for reading this fic.

You can ask questions by leaving reviews.  
I also accept constructive criticisms.


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